but there it is again, that strange, familiar taste in my mouth, still sweet, still no good

remember how you took me in your arms, drove me around in your fathers car

again, that strange, familiar taste in my mouth, still sweet, still no good

the room was old, I took off my boots, you washed your face

what a strange, familiar taste in my mouth, still sweet, still no good

we made love shyly

again, that strange, familiar taste in my mouth

you got dressed, when will I see you again

the next morning you got on a plane

I was sitting on my porch, wondering if you you wondering

you were probably just asleep, tired from your trip

such a strange, familiar taste in my mouth

strange strange strange

1. “They’re so good” - I don’t know what you’re talking about.
2. “You’re so funny” - No.
3. “I don’t want to have sex right now” - I do. I’m nervous. I also want to know that’s not all you want.
4. “I want to have sex” - I guess. Maybe I’m bored.
5. 100 - This is the number I tell people I weight. I’m more like 105.
6. 1800 - SAT score I give to people who ask. I scored a lot higher, but I’m already a fucking dork.
7. “I’m totally going jogging tonight” - I’m not. Even as I say it. I’m full of crap.
8. “I had a salad for lunch” - Nope. I had a cola and chips.
9. “I love you” - I feel bad for this one.
10. “I passed” - Actually failed.
11. “I didn’t sleep with _______” - Yea I did & I’m totally ashamed.
12. “I’m never going to drink again” - I went for a drink right after that

next tattoo: “forgive yourself”, tattooed in small script, facing me (so I can read it), at the inner bend of my arm.

My parents had a lot of problems. My family fell apart. Friends came and went. I had a bad track record with relationships. My best friend took his life 4 years ago this summer. I dated someone who almost destroyed their life and mine in their addiction and struggle with heroin. I tried to take my own life, but I survived. I had a bad addiction to drugs, to alcohol, to needing something. I blamed myself a long time for everything that had happened in my life. What I could have, should have, didn’t do. But it is time that I forgive myself. It’s time for me to really forgive myself and remind myself of this as much as possible.

1. Make you playlists.
2. Make you CDs. Yes, this requires you to have a CD player.
3. Bombard your email with songs, videos, playlists.
4. Send you lyrics.
5. Send you photos and lyrics that are irrelevant.
6. Send you photos and lyrics that are relevant relationship.
7. Update Twitter with music and lyrics.
8. Update Twitter with music and lyrics that are relevant to our relationship.
9. Update Facebook with music and lyrics.
10. Update Facebook with music and lyrics relevant to our relationship.
11. We’re going to have sex with music on.
12. We’re going to make out with music on.
13. I’m going to do stuff around you with music on.
14. I will listen to the music you want to listen to.
15. I will occasionally nod and say I like the music you introduce me to.
16. We will go to music shows together.
17. I will dance to music, hopefully you aren’t embarrassed and you dance with me.
18. If we ever fall out of love, or I fall out of love (that’s more likely) I will still listen to music. Just not the music relevant to us. At least for a while. Till I get over it. Then I’ll be all up on that.